non-caffeinated Mountain Dew

So, recently, my parents bought me pop.
normally, i'm ecstatic about this; it's rare that they buy me anything carbonated that isn't Sprite; but then i pulled out a can and actually looked at it.
First i see MT. DEW...i do a happy dance.
Then i see non-caffeinated...and my world turns into a pool of spiraling darkness from which there is no escape.
slightly melodramatic? yes.
but i just don't see the Point of non-caffeinated beverages. I mean, the only reason i drink some of this stuff is for the caffeine...certainly not for the taste (not so in the case of mt.dew, which is wonderful...but noncaffeinated does seem to be lacking...)
let's think about this...
tea
coffee
soda
energy drinks
People Drink these to wake Up!
decaf? the only reason to drink this is if you really miss the taste of coffee. ah, yes, that bitter bean taste...how do i love thee, let me count the ways....
Right.
if you really need something without caffeine, drink root beer...or sprite, 7up, water, milk, beer etcetera.
there are so many more choices than inflicting your anti-caffeine-ness on Mt. Dew or coffee.

Speaking of Mt. Dew...Throwback is amazing. i tried it at this garage sale two? three? weeks ago, and i'm hooked....not that i wasn't already.
but...wow
it just TASTES better.